Anxiety

Okay, I admit it.  I'm a little big freaked about the surgery next week.  Rationally I know that it's going to be a good thing.  My blood sugar is going up, as is my blood pressure.  I'm exhausted all the time.  My feet, knees, and back hurt. I think carrying about an extra 150 pounds will do that, right? 

I just read a letter from Obesity Help from a woman who had gastric bypass.  Stories of sagging skin, flapping breasts, hair loss, etc., are creeping me out.  She was responding in a letter, though she didn't share it with them, to women she works with who are five pounds overweight and say they're "fat."  Really?!  Get a grip ladies.  These women thought it was unfair of the letter writer to participate in a weight loss challenge at work because she was "cheating" by having WLS surgery.  Talk to me about "fat" when you don't enjoy shopping or walking because it's painful and exhausting. 

The gastric sleeve is going to be a more successful tool than the band was. Rationally, I know all that.  After I get through the post-op phase I'll be able to eat, even if it's very small amounts. 

I'm 56 years old.  My boobs have already fallen.  If I have saggy skin, so be it.  I can deal with that better than high blood pressure medicine, diabetes medicine, and not being able to walk comfortably.

Well, I feel a little better getting my anxiety out by writing about it.

Look out world!